I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
