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  • The other day I shut the passenger side door to my car for my girlfriend, and I farted the entire walk around the back of the car to the drivers door. It was nuts. We had chipotle and I had been holding in the fart for like 20 minutes. It felt so good

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 4:02am
  • I punched a priest in the dick. Hail Satan!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 5:29pm
  • I need to know how long his/her legs are...and how fast they were walking...not an accurate unit of measure to say the least! hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 4:41pm
  • My boyfriend did 10 sidewalk squares on our drunk walk home!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 1:49am
  • I'm sure there was some shart at some point but they won't mention that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 4:53pm
  • better change them funky drawers - daym!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 5:53pm
  • Dude go for 6 and do it right! Shart all over the place.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 8:48pm
  • Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 11:28pm
  • I don't care how long his legs are, or what his stride is...this poor guy needs to see a doctor...RIGHT NOW! That just ain't right. There is something seriously wrong with this guy. At least I'm assuming that it's a guy, as girls don't usually brag about things like that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 9:43pm
  • That doesn't sound like a very accurate scale...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 4:08pm
  • 6:13. What the fuck!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 11:26pm
  • OP probably had skidd marks on his undies when he was done.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 4:30pm
  • Way to give Portland a lame rep. Or maybe this was a ploy to get people to NOT move here. If it's the latter, well done.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 7:16pm
  • Go shove a broom handle in ur ass 6:13

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 1:37pm
  • are you sure the texter didn't just shit himself?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 8:41pm