Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
