if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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