Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize