do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
