i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
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