he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
it hurts more in the daytime
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
