I'm going to jail i love you
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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