fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
