Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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