There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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