I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
