Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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