Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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