So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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