Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
