I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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