in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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