i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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