If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize