Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
