4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
