Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
