and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
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