How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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