But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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