I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
