she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
