If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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