i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize
