My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We had to coat check the pizza.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize