Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
