let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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