Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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