you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
