are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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