I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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