I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
should my penis look like a turkey
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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