Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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