nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
she was so not down for the gang bang
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
