I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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