bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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