The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
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His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian