I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
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