what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
