I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Randomize