Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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