Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize