i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
handjob tips. give me some.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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