I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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