Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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